There are different ways we can start a sentence
with a subordinate clause:
1.
Use a conjunction (eg As,
Although, If…)
2. Use an adverbial phrase (ask
yourself how, where or when something
happened)
3.
Bring the verb to the front (useful in
an action sentence for dramatic effect!)
4.Start with a feeling
(Terrified,….Excited,…)
Now redraft these sentences using one of the above skills!
We
quickly positioned our shields over the side of the boat so that we were
protected from the monks’ incoming arrows.
We
finally reached the monastery.
‘Ari the Brutal’, our fearless beserker, swung
his axe at the monk and knocked him down dead instantly.
Quickly, positioning our shields over the side of the boat, we were protected from the monks’ incoming arrows. Hassan +Y6
ReplyDeleteA long time after we set sail, we saw land. Umair
ReplyDeleteExcited, we saw land! Jack
ReplyDeleteUpon the horizon, we saw land. Leighton
ReplyDeleteAfter what seemed like a decade of sailing, we finally reached the monastery. Harry
ReplyDeleteFinally reaching the monastery, we were full of glee. Yara
ReplyDeleteReaching the peaceful monastery, we finally arrived. Sumayya
ReplyDeleteInstantly, ‘Ari the Brutal’fearlessly swung his axe at the monk and knocked him down dead. Yara
ReplyDeleteSwinging his bloodthirsty battleaxe at the unsuspecting monk, ‘Ari the Brutal’ ,our fearless beserker, knocked him down dead. Instantly. Imaan
ReplyDeleteKnocking him down dead instantly, 'Ari the Brutal', our fearless beserker, swung his axe at the monk. Ruhban
ReplyDeleteFinally reaching the monastery, we sighed. Saira and Nafisa
ReplyDeleteAfter rowing for a long time, we reached land. Year 6
ReplyDeleteAfter voyaging across the wild sea, we reached land.
DeleteAfter rowing till our arms ached to bone, from rough seas turning into calm, we finally arrived at the holy monestery of Lindisfarne. Imaan
ReplyDeleteWow Imaan well done. Do you think, 'through rough seas turning to calm' sounds better? Miss M
DeleteSwinging his blood thirsty battle axe at the monk ,‘Ari the Brutal’, our fearless beserker, knocked him down dead, Instantly!
ReplyDeleteSumayya.M :)
feeling dehydrated, I thought I was hallucinating when I saw land but in the distant we saw land. YIPPY!!!!
ReplyDeleteWow year 6
ReplyDeleteYou are subordinate-superstars fantastic work
Miss Wilding
After feeling like we had been rowing for a decade we finally reached the monastery.
ReplyDeleteRemember your comma! Before the main clause. Miss M
DeleteOur fearless beserker,'Ari the Brutal', swung his dominating axe at the petrified monk and knocked him down dead instantly.
ReplyDeleteSaskia I think all of your adjectives are very carefully chosen here. Well done! Miss M
DeleteProtecting ourselves from the monks incoming arrows,we quickly positioned shields over the side of the boat.
ReplyDeleteProtecting ourselves from the monks incoming arrows,we quickly positioned shields over the side of the boat.
ReplyDeleteAfter a stormy sail, with two of my crew members perishing,
ReplyDeletewe finally reached the monestary. Nafisa
Positioning our shields over the side of our vessel, we were protecting ourselves from the monks incoming arrows.
ReplyDeleteAribah
Wonderful :-) Think about 'monks incoming arrows' How many monks are there? Do they own the arrows? How do you show the reader this?
DeleteMiss M
Seeing the crew not too far away, made my crew sail faster.
ReplyDeleteRowing our boat after a long time, we saw land. JUMP!
ReplyDeleteUmair
Wow Y6 you are getting better and better and including all these skills in your partner writing. The challenge now...can you show off your skills in your independent writing this week? Miss M
ReplyDeleteMiss Mather must be really proud of the fantastic sentences you're all writing. Well done, Year Six!
ReplyDeleteI'm really glad you're enjoying using the blog to practise new skills and learn from each other. I'll keep checking in to see what else you're up to.
Thanks to all of you who've been commenting on my class' blog too - they love hearing your comments!
Mr Ellis